Netaji's burrDay BASHed UP!!!!

A birthday is always a special day. A day to be happy about oneself. A day of celebrations. A day of spending time with family. And much more. I was quite surprised last week when I got an invite to attend a birthday party. That too in Lucknow, UP- a city I have never visited.

 I was pleasantly surprised. It was an invitation to partake in the 75th birthday of Mulayam Singh Yadav, in a most austere manner with the people of the city. I was a bit unsure. I was not planning to get mobbed and crowd-pushed and jostled and groped in this rather public birthday affair. But none the less, after much deliberations, I decided to go. I was still in two minds. 

Nothing could have prepared me for what I was about to witness, experience, partake and enjoy for the next two days!!!! 

As I made to the airport, a special counter was set up for Netaji's guests. 

How thoughtful!!! 

A chartered flight was waiting for me. As I boarded the flight, I was mentally planning to hit the sack during the 90 minutes journey from Mumbai to Lucknow. But, it was not to be so. Netaji's hospitality kept me in high spirits throughout the journey. 

How intoxicating!!!

At Lucknow airport, my luggage was separately ferried off and within a few minutes I was out of the airport on my way to a five star hotel. I was told by Netaji's staff that all this was a way for people to show their love for Netaji. How I love the UPites!!! They show their love in the most lavish of manners!!!

The evening was spent in a glitzy gala entertainer of an event performed by the Bollywood A listers who had been brought in for the birthday. As I sat in a select audience, I heard rumours that none of the stars charged a pie. Such is Netaji's relation with the Bollywood. 

How filmy!!!

After a fun-filled evening of entertainment, succulent meat dishes of the famed Lucknowi khaansamas, I had a sound sleep in my suite. 

The birthday cake was brought in the next day. To describe it as being mammoth would be a gross understatement. Besides the size, the spirit of the cake had to be celebrated. It was a gift from the citizen of the state!!! I am yet to come across such a lavish gift from the people to its leader!!! 

How charismatic!!!

The cake was accompanied by 75 candles, 75 flutes of the finest champagne I have ever had in my life and a 75 gun salute. It was so royal!!! The mere sight of Netaji with Akhilesh was a sight to behold. The father-son duo looked completely in control!!!!

How dynastic!!!

The cake was too huge and could not be finished off by Netaji's select invitees. Then Netaji showed a magnanimity befitting the greatest of the leaders of all times. He decided to share the cake with his party workers. 

Thousands of hungry people turned up to have a piece of the Grand Birthday cake. They had to return empty-handed as the state bureaucracy had achieved with the invitees inside could not. They had cleaned up the cake without a single morsel remaining. 

Then was the biggest draw of the event. Netaji with his 40 ministers and Akhilesh sat in a procession in a horse buggy imported specially from the UK for 700,000 GBP. Remember, it is a birthday celebration. The emotion matters, not the expense. It was an amazing scene. 

How humble!!! 

The normal bicycle gave way to a horse cart for that special day. BJP cadres were crying hoarse that the buggy should have been Made in India and not imported. But this was lost over the din of the procession... 

How equestrian!!!!

After the cavalcade of 75 cars, 75 horses and 75000 people covered a distance of 40 kilometers, Netaji addressed a public rally. He spoke about how the downtrodden of the state need to be brought up. How poverty had become an epidemic and how unwarranted show of strength and wealth of a few corrupt was casting a dark shadow over the state of Uttar Pradesh. How funds could be better utilized for public governance projects, medical care and hospitals and basic amenities. 

How schizophrenic !!! 

When questioned about a stampede and an eventual death of a person at the blanket distribution drive, Netaji mentioned," why cant they use heaters if they don't have blankets?" When questioned about some party worker beating up a toll worker, Netaji retorted,"that is why I was against the usage of English. The media has been making a huge noise about my birthday bash. My workers thought that it was OK to bash up somebody on my birthday. That is all!!!"

How Antoinette!!!!