the CHEATalian job!!!

The recent slip that the two Italian Marines gave the Indian Government came as a big surprise.  The Marines wanted to go back to Italy to vote in the elections (such country abiding citizens!!!) The families of the killed fishermen cried foul on the Government. The BJP lost no time in accusing the Government of being soft on this matter. 

Manmohan Singh, in his amicable disposition, requested the Italian Government to return the 2 marines. The Italian government was quick on the rebuttal and this was what was conveyed back. 

Quick to recover from this slight, Manmohan Singh, issued a STRONG statement in his soft and muted baritone that this would be taken up at the highest level and that India would not accept such breaches from Italy. 

The High Commissioner of Italy was summoned and given a strong warning that Italy should send back the two marines to face charges. The High Commissioner argued that the quality of infrastructure at the resort where the two were put up was not up to the mark and hence the Government of Italy would not return the two. The Kerala Tourism Department Corporation immediately swung into action towards renovating the Government Guest House cum Resort.

Once the renovation was completed at lightning speed – the Italian High Commissioner was again summoned to get the two marines back to India to face trial (time elapsed since escape   6 months).This time, the Italians had replaced the High Commissioner to India and the new bloke wanted more time to go through all the documents before any decision could be taken. He argued that given the history of Indian Judiciary’s snail pace – this should be agreeable. The Foreign Ministry office had no choice but to accept the request. The new Commissioner was granted 6 months to go through the various documents (time elapsed since escape 12 months).

After 6 months, the foreign ministry became quite busy with the state visit of Barack Obama and hence when the Italian High Commissioner requested for more time – he was promptly granted 6 more months (time elapsed since escape  18 months).

The new High Commissioner was under an illusion that like the millions of files in the Indian bureaucratic process; this would also meet the same fate – lost and forgotten. BJP had fresh topics to take on the Government. But alas!!!! After 6 months he was summoned once again. This time, running short on excuses- he told that he will speak with his Government on the possible extradition. In the meanwhile, the Italian Government deputed these 2 Marines to Afghanistan on a long term service deputation. This service deputation had a validity of 5 years. This was conveyed back to the Indian Government. The Indian Government had no choice but to grant an additional time to be extradited to India after 5 years (time elapsed since escape 78 months).

During the next 5 years, a lot many things happened – Congress won with a huge majority; Rahul Baba became the PM of the country; Italy was given a status of Most Favored Country, Rahul Baba was made an honorary citizen of Italy. The case of the two marines just slept through. They were given an additional deputation to Vatican City for another 15 years. Given the Vatican is a separate country within Italy, nobody even conjured up the question as to why the two seafaring marines were deputed to land locked Afghanistan and the Vatican!!!!! (time elapsed since escape  258 months).

Life goes on as usual, scams after scams are unearthed, BJP finally gets a chance to come to power at the center after 3 successive Congress regimes. LK Adwani is unanimously selected as the PM of the nation. Modi graciously steps aside for some days to allow a multi-decade long wish to get fulfilled.  

Now BJP stirs the hornet’s nest and opens up all the cans full of worms!!! BJP demands the Italian marine extradition and summons the High Commissioner and orders that the marines be brought back to face trial. Given the enormous delays that happened (258 months = 21.5 years).

This time, the Italian Government, completely cornered is desperate to come up with excuses!!!! Italy tried an old trick to entice Indians - it knew that we had a fascination for anything free with something. Italian Government informed the BJP Government that if it was ready to wait for some more time, Italy would hand over the 2 marines and as a bonus it will also hand over Ottavio Quattrocchi!!!!

This was an offer too tempting to resist!!! BJP would reopen the BOFORS scam once again!!!!  The Italian Government requested some more time to arrange for this package!!! BJP agrees. 

After 7 years....

• Quattrocchi dies of natural causes. 
• The Italian marines grow old and an entire life of physical work makes them very weak. 
• Italy apologizes that the 2 marines are not healthy enough to travel.