NO(r)WAY!!!! You think it is a child's play????

The recent incident in Norway about two Indian children being put away at foster homes has been a traumatic incident for the Bhattacharyas. Citing reasons of their mother's stability and lack of hygiene and disregard to privacy norms bestowed to Norwegian children, the Norway's now infamous Child Hygiene and Orientation Registrar, popularly known as Child Protection Services has come under lot of heat from the Government of India.

In light of this development, it is but necessary to understand what Norwegian Child Protection Policies are like. It will prove to be helpful for citizens of other nationalities to appropriately make arrangements while travelling to Norway or staying there.

The regimen begins right at the point of travel into Norway.

1. 
   
   
   If you are travelling by Norwegian Airlines - if your child is over the age of being taken out of the delivery room, the child should have a first class ticket in the flight. More than 33% of the flight seats are Child seats and the parents need to ensure that they have booked such a seat for the child. It is not necessary for the parents to book themselves into first class- they can travel anyway they want. Norwegian Airlines has Aeromoms to look after the children.
   



2. 
   
   
   All children in Norway are issued with a passport, social security card and all such documents within 12 hours of the birth. The idea permeates the concept that children should be made independent as soon as possible.
   



3. 
   
   
   All Norwegian kids can vote in the elections from the age of 2. Brightly coloured boxes with buttons are provided for the child to press the button of the party that appeals to it the most. Elections are a child's play here (literally).




4. 
   
   
   The children of Norway enjoy privileges that only few on this planet can afford. Each child has to have its own separate room. The specifications of the room size are so stringent that a centimeter here or there can result in CHOR taking over the custody of the kid.




5. 
   
   
   The Center for Child Nutrition and Overall Development has come up with an automatic feeding machine that can be pre filled from designated Center for Research on Automated Zealous Energetic Diet branches. The machine also has an auto viper to ensure that the mouth of the child is wiped clean after the meal. The machine has a video recorder that records and sends the data across to CHOR to ensure that the child feeding practice is strictly adhered to. Yes, Norway has outsourced mother's milk from neighbouring countries which is mixed into the CRAZED mix.



6. 
   
   
   All children are embedded with a touch sensitive chip when they are born. This enables the Child Protection Service to monitor the number of times the parents are allowed to touch the child in a month. In general, 10 touches are allowed per day (5 per parent). Any increase from this number will result in a fine.

Spoil the child and spare the rod,

we are there to look after:we are God,

Your child is your gift to your nation,

let it grow up without any emotion

to emerge not as a sub standard human race

but a Zero Originality Mass Built Individual Entities!!!!