Nandan's Chronicles- from an INFOSCION to a POLITICION - 4 - the AADHAAR side of the story!!!!

Hello All
The last couple of months were a kind of a working solitude for me. So much had to be done and that too in so little time.

Well, after the last updates that I gave you about my induction into the Government services- the machinery began to move very quickly and efficiently. A cabin with all the latest gizmos was made available in just 1 week, a team at my beck and call in the next two.

Wow!!!! I texted Murthy once more – "for all the rounds and circles that we used to make around these corridors to get things approved- things have come to a full circle and the Government machinery moves fast now!!!"

Now, to update you all with all the arduous tasks that I had to manage and execute- there were just too many to explain but I will pick up some of the more interesting ones that I was challenged with!!!
Getting the team set up was the most challenging job. There were so many applications from so many ministers’ so many relatives’ so many acquaintances….

I had planned to recruit some top brains from my earlier company but that was turned down by the Government as it would amount to favouring my earlier company. I was given a directive that all recruitments should be under the guidelines and directives of the Government Authorized Department of Human Asset Suppliers (GADHAS).
I set off making a team of best that I was offered. To be honest- I was initially skeptical but that cynicism changed to admiration when I saw the talent that was provided to me!!!!!

2. The next biggest challenge was to know the scope of the work and the number of my potential customers. I was trying to give an identity to x number of people where X itself was unidentified!!!!

3. Even as I just began work – there were widespread criticisms on this project (that it was a white elephant that India could not afford) and the media bytes made the work just as tough. I had to spend so much time in news studios explaining this again and again (somehow I wished if I could have got so much media space when I was in Infosys!!!! It would have been wonderful!!!).

4. Another issue was a court litigation filed by Idea Cellular accusing us of plagiarism. Their point was – giving numbers to people instead of names was an IDEA propagated in their advertisement and that it was a copyright infringement!!! Fortunately, at almost the same time- D Raja was facing the heat and Idea was subtly advised to withdraw the case else be ready for limited spectrum!!!! I was not a part of this but I came to know about this when suddenly the lawsuit was withdrawn!!!

5. Another exciting time was when we had to christen this project. So many names came up from so many quarters!!! ASTITVA was one name that was suggested but we got into a copyright issue with Mahesh Manjrekar who holds the name rights. We tried to buy him out but he came up with a demand that could not have been met by any ministry – he wanted to be given the best actor award for any of his films that would come up in this fiscal!!!! My government colleague and an actor par excellence – Govinda tried to intervene and politely explain that what he did on screen could not, by any standards be considered as acting!!! Mr. Manrekar did not relent so we sought other options finally hitting upon AADHAAR!!!!

AADHAAR is a conjunction of two thoughts

AAM AADMI + AADHA AAHAR culminating into a solution for both into AADHAAR!!!!

6. When the blue print was ready – the politics started trickling in. Each minister wanted his or her constituency to be the first to receive the Unique Identification numbers!!!

The following were the constituencies that came up for the contention:-
Patna – Laloo Prasad (rationale being UIAI should be launched first in Patna where cows and buffaloes have more identity than humans!!!!)

Chennai – K Karunanidhi (the rationale document was written in Tamil with no translation and hence was technically rejected!!)

Baramati – Sharad Pawar (there was an immediate need to know the number of people in Baramati who may have defaulted on Cooperative bank loans held by Mr. Pawar and his family- this would be a windfall information for him)

Amethi – Madamji (In Rome, speak like the Romans!!!!) (rationale being – 3 generations of Gandhi family have won from that place and the place is still in shambles so it would do some good by giving the vast majority of the population there with a number and get some more hype)

I was also asked to pick up one place. I was clueless till somebody came up with the idea of NANDurbar as it went well with my name and that place had just been given electricity a week ago!!!!
I said ok.

There was a lucky draw and to everybody’s surprise!!!!!! My nomination got selected!!!! I thought this was a celestial blessing and a good omen that the project will be truly successful!!!!

NANDURBAR
29th Sept 2010
The moment of truth has arrived!!! It is the delivery day for the first release of my project!!! We all reached there with the CM- Mr. Ashok Chawan.

People by hordes had gathered there (there was a lunch session organized by the local MLA!!!).
There were speeches by Manmohan, Madamji , Ashok and then finally I got a chance!!!!
We all spoke at length on how this number is going to change their lives!!! How they can now be known by numbers for all official purposes!!!!
Manmohan then distributed 10 cards to the locals there and there was a lot of media coverage and lots of applause!!!!

I was on top of the world!!!!!!

We all had lunch after the event!!! I was receiving congratulatory calls and messages all through the day!!!!
We all left happy and satisfied!!!!

I later came to know that some souvenir hungry media personnel actually bought each of these 10 cards for INR 100,000 !!!!!

The purpose of AADHAAR was thus finally achieved!!!! By getting the Unique Identification Number – 10 people rose from Below Poverty Line to lakhpatis!!!!!!

Murthy would be so proud of me today – I have achieved for once- which I never did in my IT career – provide some measureable gains to my end customers and not some bug plagued application which is more debugged and updated than used!!!!!

Sriky

from an INFOSCION to a POLITICION- Nandan' s Chronicles - 3 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AT THE ONSET, LET ME CLARIFY THAT THIS IS A FICTITIOUS ACCOUNT NARRATED IN A FIRST PERSON LANGUAGE OF MR. NILEKANI'S IMAGINARY TRYSTS WITH THE GOVERNMENT SECTOR. THIS HAS NOT BEEN WRITTEN MR. NILEKANI, AS SHOULD HAVE BEEN GAUGED BY READING THE POST. THE ARTICLE HAS BEEN WRITTEN IN JEST AND HUMOUR AND WOULD REQUEST THE READERS TO ALSO TAKE THIS IN THE SIMILAR LIGHT.

Dear Chums,

After the first two installments of Nandan’s tryst with the Great Indian Political System, I would now want to share some of his jottings on how he has started getting settled down and going about his day to day tasks. The first two installments are available on www.ideasinfinitum.blogspot.com .

After the initial humdrum and the hoopla died a natural death and Nandan started getting the feel of the new job, things were not appearing to be so rosy. Each pizza comes with its own pitfall and Mr. Nilekani was very well aware of this. Let us see some of his writings which he has started circulating around…

DATE – 1st Aug 2009
VENUE – Yojna Bhavan, first floor, corner cabin (all cabins are identical so democracy at its best!!!!!!!!!!)

Finally I am settling down into my new life. Phew!!!! I had no idea it would be so elaborate and detailed. So many documents to sign, photographs, documents, family details etc.!!! No wonder, there is a lot that we need to learn from the Government. I shall point this out to Kris (Kris Gopalakrishnan- CEO Infosys) to follow some of the processes so that we, sorry they (now that I am no longer an Infoscion) can screen fake candidates!!!! There is something to learn everywhere!!!!

As for my new innings, I have started getting some very good vibes and some cold ones as well. I have made some new friends- Shashi Tharoor. I always saw him at UN events on TV, but never interacted with him. After my induction day, I spent some time talking to him. He told me that he loved my book. He also suggested that I should start writing more regularly, now that I was free from the corporate hustle bustle. I was surprised. This new job is more challenging than running a company!!!!

Other friends include Laloojee, Mani Sankar, Azhar and some from the opposition also – Arun Jaitley, Shatrughan Sinha (I took a snap with him!!!).

Amar and Mulayam Singh have given me a cold shoulder.

Probably because of my attraction and their repulsion to Computers???

I was a tad disappointed when I went to the canteen… the food was not good, the portions very tiny. The service was very good. I was given coupons for one month. I just casually asked the contractor as to the reason behind the taste and portion. He replied,” Our politicians are carnivores of the highest order. They can devour anything that comes their way- food, drink, cash, kind, cheques, contracts, plots, fodder…This is our small attempt to bring them back to shape and health. The bad taste and tiny portions ensure that they do not visit this canteen and go out for their lunch or snacks”.

I was mighty impressed!!! In Infosys, we used to spend so much time and effort to provide the best food that our employees could have and when they fell ill after eating all those pizzas, we gladly gave them sick leaves also!!!!! Another area of learning for corporate!

While I was coming out of the canteen, I overheard Mulayam Singh ask the Canteen Contractor,” Yeh pappu bhi yahan aata hai khaane ke liye?” I felt so good!!! Finally Mr. Singh had shown some friendly gesture by calling me with a pet connotation- pappu!!!! I was beaming with happiness. I do not like animosities at work place!!!!

The office contains a maze of corridors and alleys and it’s a long walk to my cabin. Around the corner, I overheard one gentleman whisper to his colleague,” He is the new pappu… the one in the white shirt and tie”
Again Pappu? ???

All my eagerness went for a swim when I was told that pappu was my batch grade!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I had a different designation given to me (www.ideasinfinitum.blogspot.com for the first part of the story)!!!!

I called up my manager Manmohan. His PA answered the call,” Sir is busy right now formulating a list of all important Indians who should be exempt from frisking at airports after Dr. Kalam’s incident, do you want me to add your name to the list?”. I gave a polite No as an answer. I told him that I had a query about my designation. He replied that I could get it resolved from the HRD ministry which is responsible for designations.

I contacted the HRD ministry and I got my answer.

PAPPU – POLITICAL ASPIRANT from PRIVATE PUBLIC UNIFICATION!!!!!!!!!!!

I am getting more and more overwhelmed by the levels of details and thought being given to each and every minute aspect!!!! My designation was still the same and I fell in the band of PAPPU.

I have 3 months for my first review. I start off preparing myself for some POC exercises. I have so many ideas in my head that need to be tried out.

I text Murthy again,” I have settled down and about to assume my duties, yours PAPPU!!!!!!!!!!”

sriky

From an INFOSCION to a POLITICION - Nandan's Chronicles - 1

The recent news headlines that the Co-Chairman of Infosys, Nandan Nilekani will be joining the Government planned initiative of Unique Identification Authority of India, did manage to surprise me. Finally we are seeing some kind of private-public partnership which is so common in the developed countries. I wish Mr. Nilekani all the best in his endeavours and hope that he successfully accomplished this project like the many others that he has during his tenure in Infosys.

But imagine my woes!!! Little did I consider the fact that if Government of India was like Government of India Ltd, things would not have been in such a disarray and abeyance.

So, after the initial days of Nandan’s foray into unchartered territory, I had a sneak peak into his diary. Unlike his erstwhile corner room cabin in the sprawling Infosys campus, he had to make do with a common room at the Yojna Bhavan building and the diary was just lying on the table.

So, presenting here ONLY FOR YOU, the unabridged first person account of Nandan’s experiences of the first couple of days into his new avatar!!!!!



DATE- 15th JUNE 2009

TIME – 8.00 am

INFOSYS CAMPUS

I am really excited today. Finally I shall be able to do something that I always yearned to do- involve myself in the public good and welfare!!! Wow!!! This just seems like a dream!!!! I could not believe when I got a call from the PMO asking me whether I was interested in taking up this project-Unique Identification Authority of India. The designation offered is a Cabinet Minister, my immediate Project Manager would be Manmohan and the Senior Project Manager would be Sonia, under the section of Remuneration, it was written – Remuneration is a matter of appetite and capacity of the resource. I intend to find out more on this. I had a word with Murthy and this is what he had to tell me,” Nandan, I think you should take this offer up. There are 2 reasons for that. The first one being that this will remind you that we were a group who started this company and till date, I am hearing complaints from the remaining chaps that even they want to run the show for some time. This will also give you a chance to experience the speed and pace of the Government sector and I shall stand redeemed for all those comments you used to make about me being slow during the days of us getting the licenses to get computers etc.”

So, like always, I heeded to Murthy’s idea and decided to jump at the opportunity. I follow the processes for the F & F at Infosys in anticipation of a great career ahead!!!

DATE – 20th JULY 2009

TIME – 8.00 am

PARLIAMENT HOUSE

I am very nervous. I will be meeting all the big and great leaders of my country today. I am wearing a brand new suit that I have got for this occasion. As I enter the security check, I am frisked by a machine (very similar to the ones seen at airports, but somebody told me that it also checks that one cannot carry his/her brains inside!!!). I just rubbish this rumour. I am told that I need to deposit my mobile phone and my laptop bag. I request that I need to take my laptop bag as I have a presentation to make today. The durbaan seemingly did not understand this and does let me take my laptop bag inside.

I happen to see some of our leaders, walking purposefully, thoughtfully chewing paan-tobacco, probably thinking about the issues at hand, I presume. I see my immediate PM (Project Manager) Manmohan. He is waving out to me. I smile and walk up to him. He wishes me all the best and tells me that he will be introducing me to the House today. I thank him and ask him whether I can get a laptop docking station somewhere so that I can charge up my laptop before the presentation.

He mentions that during the last Government, when the ruling party needed support, TDP’s Chandrababu Naidu had joined the Government. During that time, Naidu had demanded that all the rooms in the Parliament House be made Wi-Fi and each desk in the Lok Sabha and Rajya Sabha be provided with a laptop docking station.

I immediately heaved a sigh of relief. There would not be any glitches. I am ashamed to say this but even in our offices, things don’t work only when there are client presentations!!!!

My relief was very short lived. Before I could thank Manmohan, he went on to mention that during the last Vote of No Confidence, it was Samajwadi Party who had supported the Government. Eradication of Computers was a prime agenda on the Samajwadi Manifesto and hence Mulayam Singh had demanded that all the Wi-Fi services and docking stations be removed from both the houses. What a Sakt decision!!! I am a bit worried about how would I be making the presentation if the laptop is not charged!!!! Manmohan assures me that he will arrange for adequate time towards that and I should not worry about it. Such a considerate Manager he is!!!!!


Just like my corner office cabin, I am given a corner seat in the big grand hall. I have always seen this on television. This is amazing. These guys have taken utmost care to ensure that I feel at home here also. It was only much later that I was told that the corner seat offered the least risk of being hit by microphone or microphone stands during the parliamentary sessions and since I was not an adept shirker of shoulders (or tasks), it would be safer for me to sit in a corner!!!!

The morning session is starting off!!!!! The Honourable Speaker has arrived. I am nervous, just like my first day at Patni!!!!

I shall provide the details of what transpired during the day after EOD/COP (whatever is the jargon used in your organization)!!!! Await my next blog!!!!!!

As I take my nascent steps into this new domain,

I hope that leaving that lucrative job will not be in vain,

All my life I dreamt of saving my country from all crises,

Hope that from Infosys, I do not fall into an Abyss!!!!


Sriky