In the Interest of Nobody
This is to inform all readers about the creation of a limited ownership unlimited liability conpany -SAchHARA India Parivar UnLimited.
The conpany has been registered under the CONPANIES ACT of Uttar Pradesh 9999 sub section 420 on the 31st September 2012. The registered office for this organization is
SAchHARA India Parivar UNlimited
Shanty Number 419, Cove Number 99, Caymen Islands
This is to inform all that this conpany is a privately held establishment with business interests in the following gamuts of the industry:-
- Political Revenue Management
- Civil Services Gratitude Funds
- Cricket Club Franchises
- Premier League Football Club Franchises
- Heera Pheri banking
- Matching and Fixing Tournaments
- unReality Development
- And many other small and medium enterprises in airlines, hospitality, pharma, consumer retail, mining, rural communications, supply chain and logistics, manufacturing, and etc and etc...
The conpany till date has a market capitalization of 1,11,000 Crore INR across all it's business interests. These are unaudited figures as a couple of hundred crores could be more or less. The conpany has an earning before manipulation, forgery and devious actions (EBMFDA) for the fiscal closing March 2013 of 44,000 Crore INR. The profit after no tax (PANT) is ... 44,000 Crore INR. For the first time perhaps, the annual earnings = annual profits!!!! Unprecedented in the history of disorganized corporate sector. This unique achievement was possible only because of one factor - the conpany did not incur operational expenses. How would that be possible? Simply because we work as a FAMILY and all work is done on pure GOODWILL.
The conpany has decided to award it's share holders with a one time dividend bonus of 100 INR per Share held. The date for this consideration is 28th Feb 2013. The number of shareholders of SAchHARA India Parivar UNlimited has increased from 34,550,000 to 54,776,999 since October 1st 2012 to March 31st 2013. We thank our shareholders for the trust they have instilled upon us. This is a matter of great pride for us that a vast majority of Indians have embraced us and invested in us. We would like to thank Mr.Chadha, Ms. Wati, Mr. Singh, Mr Jadav, Mr. Power, Mr. Dandi, , Mr. Soy who do not constitute our 54776999 shareholders.
Now, SEBI has asked us to share the details of our 54776999 shareholders. Obviously since Honesty is one of the pillars on which our organization is founded, we are complying to.......
In perhaps, what is the single largest consignment of documents in the world being delivered to a Government Organization - 20000 trucks carrying 204776999 pages of documents (20 crore pages)- we complied. Now, along with that lot - one separate document was also sent which informed SEBI on some terms & conditions:-
- One week's notice will be required from SEBI to make one SAchHARA worker available to provide any clarifications.
- Only 10 forms per day will be clarified. Any additional form clarification will entail 100 INR per form.
- Working hours will be strictly SAchHARA Samay - 12 noon to 4 pm.
- SEBI will bear the responsibility of ensuring the safe keeping and security and order of the documents. All the pages per application should be provided to our employee in sequence.
- If any discrepancy is identified in the document related to any of our investor, SAchHARA will take 15 working days to investigate and clarify.
Now it is a different story that all the names will be fictitious or some mere coincidental. For SEBI to investigate, it will be beyond any of our life spans. Our response - Our share holders do not reside in houses or flats - they are in our hearts!!!!
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